54: This Isn't Even My Pasta Salad! (ft. Blair Warrick)

What if the birthday you plan is really a love letter to yourself? We dive into the messy, funny, and honest side of celebrating as adults—especially after motherhood—where a perfect day might look like a winery flight, three excellent pizzas, and the relief of not hosting. With our cousin Blair in the mix, we trace how birthdays evolve from glow‑stick college parties and $5 covers to intentional, low‑key gatherings that honor who we are now.

We unpack the tension between planning and surprises—why control can feel like protection against being forgotten, and how a good surprise should add to, not replace, a day that’s already yours. Motherhood reshapes the calendar, too: kids’ birthdays feel like your milestone, sleep is gold, and “doing nothing” becomes a worthy plan. From setting boundaries around hosting to embracing found family when you live across the country, we share practical strategies for making your day meaningful without making it a production.

Along the way, we swap stories: the Temecula party bus and the Uber that bailed mid‑ride, a teary 21st at midnight because a cousin wasn’t there, and the food memories that hold our grandparents close—Pop‑Pop’s spaghetti night, Nanny’s gift‑bag magic, and the pasta salad that gets requested all summer. If you’ve ever wanted to be celebrated but struggled to ask, this conversation is your permission slip. 

Hit play for real talk on boundaries, joy, and the rituals that make another year feel like a win. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs birthday courage, and leave a review so more listeners can find us.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Meet the Hosts and Cousin Blair
• 1:45 October Birthdays Set the Stage
• 2:23 Winery Celebration and Pizza Lore
• 3:21 The Temecula Party Bus and Uber Fiasco
• 6:10 This-or-That: Wine, Out vs In, Surprises
• 9:25 Planning Control vs Being Surprised
• 12:25 Motherhood and How Birthdays Change
• 16:10 Distance, Found Family, and Hosting Boundaries
• 19:32 The 21st Birthday Tears and Cousin Bond
• 22:05 DIY Parties, Blacklights, and Cover Charge
• 26:00 Wanting Celebration Without Asking
• 28:15 Advice to Younger Selves at Milestones
• 31:45 Nanny, Pop-Pop, and Food Memories
• 35:05 West Coast Now, East Coast Maybe
• 49:00 Wrap Up and Listener CTA

Transcript

SPEAKER_02: 0:04

Welcome to Turn the Page Podcast. Sisters, best friends, and brunch enthusiasts with relatable episodes that feel like you're chatting with two of your closest friends or sisters. Join us as we turn the page on different topics about losing yourself in motherhood, adulthood, anyhood.

SPEAKER_03: 0:22

And finding yourself again through meaningful friendships, shameless piles of unread library books, and endless Amazon package deliveries.

SPEAKER_04: 0:30

Real, honest, and a little bit chaotic.

SPEAKER_02: 0:33

We talk about it all. So grab your favorite drink, put the kids to bed, lace up your sneaks or whatever you need to do and join us. We can't wait to connect with you. Hi guys, welcome to Turn the Page Podcast. This is your ghost, co-host, Tawana Page.

SPEAKER_03: 0:46

This is your other co-host, Sheree Page Barber. Um, and we have a guest, one of our cousins, Blair Warwick. I'm here. I'm so excited. Yeah, yeah. We love you.

SPEAKER_04: 0:59

Um, do you want to do an intro?

SPEAKER_03: 1:04

Um, not really, only because I don't know what I would say. Like maybe I'm your cousin. That's all I got. Fair enough. I mean, our dad and your mom are brother and sister. That's how we're connected. Yes, I have two sisters. I have two sisters. I'm the oldest. Yeah. I mean, oh, actually, it's really funny because I was thinking about this the other day how Sheree and I are only a couple months apart, and it's like sometimes we were like treated like twins, not so much that everyone saw us as one, but we would get lumped together. So I guess that's a fun fact that we're similar in age.

SPEAKER_04: 1:40

But that's we are um also on brand, because this episode is about birthdays. You also have an October birthday on October 14th. Yes.

SPEAKER_03: 1:52

And I'm October Libra in the house, and my birthday is tomorrow, October 5th, but when this comes out, it'll be well past then. But this birth this podcast is about birthdays, so we're all on it. We are on brand, and fun fact that we have the same birthday month, but we are separate signs, but we're still cousins, and it's cool.

SPEAKER_02: 2:13

We still always have the same birthday month. We're still cousins.

SPEAKER_03: 2:16

Yeah, do you wanna um I'm curious if you were gonna share how you celebrated your birthday? Oh, absolutely. Okay, so I went to a winery with a few friends from work and Sheree. So fun. It was fun, it was low-key.

SPEAKER_02: 2:32

We had the winery specializes in brick oven pizza, which was so good.

SPEAKER_03: 2:36

Oh, I didn't know that part. So it was brick oven pizza and wine, and they only have three pizzas. It's margarita, mushroom, and pepperoni. Um, we got all three. We did a wine tasting before that, and it was just really good.

SPEAKER_02: 2:51

It was fun, it was low-key.

SPEAKER_04: 2:53

Sweet little um family dogs room, the property.

SPEAKER_02: 2:56

Yes, the owner's dog's room.

SPEAKER_04: 2:57

Oh my god, it was so cute. And it is cute.

SPEAKER_03: 3:00

Wait, I love I love wineries for birthdays. I love that.

SPEAKER_04: 3:05

Yeah, I think it's definitely the vibe for 30s for sure. Yeah, I mean, but you did it. You weren't 30 yet.

SPEAKER_03: 3:11

Was that your we talked about that?

SPEAKER_04: 3:13

330. We talked about that.

SPEAKER_03: 3:15

Uh-huh. We're like, we went to visit our cousin for her birthday end of October, and I was like, we went to Temecula. Yes, we did. We so it was just after COVID, and I got a party bus because I was like, we need to start living again. And also the prices were so cheap because it was right out of COVID that they probably just wanted people to use their services. And it's so crazy because I did think about this the other day, and it's not funny, but I was like, what are the chances that this is how it would turn out when you when you guys came back? You didn't take the bus back with us. It was the two of you. Yeah, it was me and something, yes. Yeah, and you guys had taken an Uber and the ride back to my apartment literally, uh, the ride in total was probably 45 to an hour. And you guys had never taken an Uber before, and I was like, it's totally fine, even though it was later on at night. But you were with Cynthia, and you guys get in the car. I don't even know how long you were in the car for, but the driver just ditched you in the middle of the ride. Can I remember? It was a woman, yeah. She did. She dropped you at a hotel because she was like, I'm sorry, it's too far to take you.

SPEAKER_04: 4:30

At the hotel at the motel. Do you remember that? He was like, Oh, your destination is gonna take me like two hours to get together. And I have kids, something with my kids. So, like, yes, can I just drop you off here and like hopefully you guys find another ride? We were like, What?

SPEAKER_03: 4:49

And then I what I I feel like I remember like you guys didn't really have strong like Wi-Fi or cell reception, something where it was just harder to get another one. And by the time we had gotten back with the bus, I remember we're walking, and I just hadn't gotten a text from you guys yet that you were back. And I started to see my apartment and the lights weren't on, and I'm like, something feels weird. Like, where are they? Why aren't they here yet? And I call and I found out, and I was like, Okay, I really hope that this doesn't turn you guys off of Ubers because this is not what it's like.

SPEAKER_01: 5:21

We had a guy, right?

SPEAKER_03: 5:23

A guy, a guy in an SUV, he was super cool, and the whole way, because I was my oldest was three at the time, and then I was just found out the day before I left that I was seven weeks pregnant with my second, told you and your two sisters that you called that day, like when we got there, that obviously I couldn't drink. So I was like, Cynthia, I'm pregnant, I'm a mother. Like, what is going on?

SPEAKER_02: 5:51

And it's um my niece Cherie's daughter was not born yet, so she was like, What are you talking about? She was like, You'll be fine. I was like, Cynthia, I'm a mother!

SPEAKER_03: 6:00

Like, I can't be out here on these streets like this. Yeah, it was crazy. It was super scary, but guys, this is a segue into our episode today, which is about birthdays. Well, first we have this or that. We do have a this or that guest fashion. So, um, white or red wine? Oh, white. Oh, whites right here, a little ASMR for you. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_04: 6:24

Here, let's love it, love it. Um, yeah, I mean, I like a sweet, so I'll drink any color as long as I I I swing any color. I swing white, I would say.

SPEAKER_03: 6:36

Yeah. I think sweet, sweet really makes my head hurt now. So a little bit dry, but I like it. Does I like the different flav, like not the floral, maybe the floral, like things that seem sweet but aren't as sweet. Does that make sense?

unknown: 6:53

It does.

SPEAKER_04: 6:53

It does.

SPEAKER_03: 6:54

That's what I lean towards.

SPEAKER_04: 6:55

Or like, I like the citrusy.

SPEAKER_03: 6:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04: 6:58

But I think that it's got a little bit of um maybe the floral or like the vanilla. Like the sweet. It's like not sweet like a rose, but it's sweet enough. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Um, do we like to go out or stay in for our birthday?

SPEAKER_03: 7:16

Um, so I will say I went out for my birthday this year. I don't always love it.

SPEAKER_02: 7:20

I planned it. Um, I liked going out, it was low-key, but I also don't mind staying in. It just depends on how I'm feeling.

SPEAKER_03: 7:31

Yeah, I was gonna say either or, but then if I was honest with myself, like looking back, I don't know, probably since college, I like to go out every single time. Yeah, every single time. Like, but uh but the energy is always a little bit different. Like for my 30th, which I was sad you guys weren't there or couldn't go, but oh yeah, Hawaii got a house. Well, it was gonna be Hawaii, but then there were the fires, so had to pivot. Went to Malibu instead. It was really nice. Right, it was so calm, like massages, facials, like the winery there, again, another winery, so nice. Um, and then last year, Shri came to visit, super chill. We went to Julian, which I don't, I mean, I don't know if a lot of people know what Julian is like. It's close by to San Diego, Southern California, and you go and it's like it's in the mountains, but it's not that high up, but there's a noticeable difference, and it actually felt like fall, the leaves were changing colors, it was really chilly. And that was for your birthday. I feel like that's so you wouldn't think around that time. You would think that all the time in Southern California, we call it second summer, it's really hot here, so we're always usually sweating, but yeah, whether it's just like dinner or doing something really fun, I do like to go out. Honestly, on my birthday, I like to dance, I really do, unless I'm trying to chill, and then I just want to go to dinner. Yeah, I do. What about you, She?

SPEAKER_04: 9:09

I think I go out. I was just telling your friend today because I'm usually I hibernate, I would say, from like November to uh March slash April to May. It's my like you're coming out here, yeah. Yeah, out of the crater and like everything's happy, yeah. So I but I'm not like a go out, like I'll do like a small gathering, but it's like out of the house, like I'm like something. Um yeah, so then the last one is surprise or planned. Do we like surprises?

SPEAKER_03: 9:43

No, I like a plan because I planned this, yeah, but the gifts that I got today were a complete surprise, and I loved it. And I was just really happy that like the people that came, like it was a small group, but it was like perfect. Like we were all like air signs and also like sun and moon, like it was just it was a perfect fit. Like everybody was kizmitted chill, yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 10:13

And I obviously talk about my sister at work all the time, and I'm just like, you guys are gonna love her, and it was vice versa point, and then we mentioned you obviously and your sisters, but I'm like, like if you were there, you would have been like, Yep, this would have matched up as well.

SPEAKER_03: 10:31

Yeah, I when you said that I was thinking it's kind of hard because I feel like I don't like to ask people for things when it comes to my birthday, so I like to plan it all.

SPEAKER_02: 10:42

Well, take that back. My sister mom asked me what I wanted for birthday, and like I sent them ideas.

SPEAKER_03: 10:48

Um no, that's uh honestly, I commend you for that because I'm trying to be more that way, like so. But my friend and her sister who who came gave me a fresh bouquet of flowers. Oh, that's so sweet, and I'm into fresh flowers now. Those are the only things I'll accept into my home because of your cousin and my sister, yeah. Because her friend took a class and I'm like really into it. Oh yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04: 11:21

But guess what? Go ahead and finish what you said.

SPEAKER_03: 11:29

Um, I'm really free. I don't even know. I'm still here. Can you hear me? Okay, great.

SPEAKER_04: 11:37

Um what do you mean? I'm already here. You're there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 11:50

L O L. Alright, well, I'm gonna keep talking until they can hear me again. Oh, you know, you're not gonna hear.

SPEAKER_04: 11:57

Oh, yeah, it just went out for a second. Have you?

SPEAKER_03: 11:59

I'm so sorry, but have you ever seen the news clip of um Courtney and Kardashian and they ask her a question and she doesn't want to answer, so she just freezes and it looks like they're like, did we lose you?

SPEAKER_04: 12:10

Courtney, are you there? That's what I thought was happening.

SPEAKER_03: 12:15

No, I haven't seen that. I'm gonna have to look that up. But um, in terms of surprising versus planning, I think it's an issue of like control versus no control because I don't want to feel forgotten or let down, like any of those things. But at this point, it's like obviously friends and family know you and love you, like that the likelihood that that's gonna happen is so low, but still I can't release that as much as I want to. So I like to plan everything. I don't always ask people for really anything other than to just like show up and have a good time and enjoy themselves. But secretly, deep down, I've always wanted a surprise birthday, but not in the sense where it seems like everybody forgot my birthday. I'm sorry, that sounds like torture. Like, oh, you're so sad all day, but just wait. No, I don't want to wait. Like, how about I enjoy my day and then you surprise me with something else? That'd be nice.

SPEAKER_00: 13:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 13:15

Can I just say for my 40th next year, I am having a 90s vibe party.

SPEAKER_03: 13:22

100%. I have a denim bucket hat that I've been wanting to wear. So perfect, yeah. Perfect. That's your entry fee.

SPEAKER_04: 13:33

Um on the pad today, we're talking about birthdays, all things birthdays. I didn't answer. I thought you did. I didn't. Okay, so please please check. Please check. I'm trying. I'm gonna think. Okay. Um have you ever had a surprise party? I don't think so. Okay. And that like that's okay. I think it's nice, but I don't know. Planning is cool too, because then you just know who's gonna be there and what's gonna happen. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Um, so yeah, birthdays. Birthdays, birthdays. Hold on.

SPEAKER_02: 14:06

Let me get the so when this comes out, it'll be past my birthday. I'm probably closer to Blair's, but my birthday is tomorrow, October 5th.

SPEAKER_03: 14:14

Yeah, what are you gonna do on the actual day? Obviously, you celebrated today, just before at the winery, but like, do you have plans for tomorrow?

SPEAKER_02: 14:23

No, the boys have swim class on Sunday, so it happens to follow my birthday. I'm just gonna chill.

SPEAKER_03: 14:28

That's nice.

SPEAKER_02: 14:28

I mean, that's all I really want.

SPEAKER_03: 14:29

I mean, yeah, today was cool. I liked it. Wait, I have a question about that for both of you guys. I'm curious how birthdays have changed now that you're mom's, whether it's your own birthday or their birthdays, whether it's planning for them or how excited they get. You know what I mean? Or like even like your own birthday, like you said, like you're gonna be at the pool with the kids. So I don't know. So for their birthdays, it feels like my birthday because I was there, you know. Um actually, sorry, let me interrupt you for a second. That's so real. Like the birthday you guys should be celebrated on the birthday. I just thought about that maybe two weeks ago. It took me 31 years to get to the point of like I celebrate my birthday, I didn't do anything. Like my mom did all the work. Maybe I should be celebrating her on my birthday, but anyway, keep going. So they came out of me on you know, play.

SPEAKER_02: 15:24

Um, both of them. And I should be so like I'm celebrated as well. I celebrate myself on their birthday because I was there. I was of course fully fully present. They came out of me. Um, on my actual birthday as a mom, I feel as though I don't really need to go like full out.

SPEAKER_03: 15:46

Like, I went full out today.

SPEAKER_02: 15:48

Um I mean, they're home with dad today, which is fine. Um, I'll just hang out with everyone tomorrow. I feel like the older I get, I don't really like need like fancy, flashy things, just like intentional like things. And a lot of people couldn't come to my birthday party today, but it's like because they were out of town or because they had other plans. Like I fully knew that people have have lives outside of like celebrating my birthday, but like yeah, the ones that got back to me were like, wish I could make it, but like I have other things planned. Like, I'm just like, please have fun. So it's like it was intentional, like made me sad, of course, but um like people that were there had like uh I had an amazing time, it was a blast.

SPEAKER_03: 16:30

Yeah, um and I like intimate, and I like my full reason for for inviting everybody was to introduce them to my sister because they talk about her, talk about her all the time, and I was like, I just want you to introduce them to my sister.

SPEAKER_02: 16:49

Um they loved her, of course, obviously.

SPEAKER_03: 16:52

I my first birthday as a mom, I just cried.

SPEAKER_04: 16:57

Did you? Yeah, because I was like, this doesn't feel she was six months, almost six months, yeah. So we were still deep in the trenches, yeah. Um it just felt different, and like I don't like to make a big fuss about it, but I at least like for it to be acknowledged in the hall. So like maybe I'd like to read the bed all day or like whatever it is, and that wasn't an option because it was a weekend, and obviously, like Brandon works weekends, yeah. Um so I think as the years have gone on, I've just tried to be more intentional. Like this year, we did the winery thing too. Yep. Um, and last year's my bachelorette. I mean, I don't think anything will talk about it.

SPEAKER_03: 17:36

Which obviously you were there for it. Of course, of course. So obviously you wouldn't miss it. You'd have missed the wedding, you and your sister, you or your sisters or your family, whatever. But like, but you're talking about that at my birthday party today. It's like the her bachelor party was so freaking fun. So fun. It was so fun. Yeah, that's a good question, though. I mean I mean went to a winery. I forgot about that. Of course. So it was so fun.

SPEAKER_04: 18:04

Does it feel different for you being for I feel like you've made like your family out there, but does it feel different for you being away from family because it's out there now?

SPEAKER_03: 18:14

Yeah, Taylor is out here, but for this year, it is comments. I feel like no, no hate or shade to her at all. No hate or shade to anybody, actually. Yeah, but I set this expectation and boundary for myself that I will not be hosting anybody for my birthday this year because I have hosted people like in my living space, probably for the past four years. Um and it's really nice, but at the end of the weekend, I'm always really exhausted. And then it yeah, it's fun and fulfilling, but it doesn't, it's just go, go, go. So I was like, you know what? I'm gonna take a little bit of a break and it'll be great. So I'm gonna see her the weekend before. But I think part of the reason why that happened is because I did always miss having people that I felt really close and connected to. Like I lived out here almost 10 years now.

SPEAKER_02: 19:04

And oh my god, it's been 10 years.

SPEAKER_03: 19:06

Almost I know I moved out here in 2016, and so in the beginning, it was a lot of like uh, like you said, creating connections, like this is my family away from family. So it was, and we were young, like 22, 23. So we were going out a lot. Not that it wasn't meaningful, but it was very not even like surface level, that feels rude to say. It was just different, and um it was like a little chaotic, like and wanted people around that knew me really well, and I was still getting to know these people. So at a certain point, I always had somebody come visit for my birthday, whether it was you guys or sh or Shri, please. I'm looking at you, sure. Whether it was you guys or Sophia or Jamira, yeah, my family, then it was really nice. So yeah, it's interesting because now too, I do like planning my birthday, but it's funny because I feel like I'm practicing for when I have kids because I figure myself, it's not like, oh, I want to have this big grand event. I'm like, no, but I do want to figure out the best way to plan something that might meet everybody's needs, and it's like a cute, fun thing. How can I get creative with it? Because when I have kids, I feel like this is the part that I'm really gonna enjoy, maybe once once they're like three and above. Um but yeah, so I think about that, and it's changed over the years because I'm like, where's my family? Isn't anyone here? Which, yeah, also not to go on another tangent, but what I thought about the other day was my 21st birthday. Yes, and why do I bring this up? You ask? Well, like I said before, Sri and I, when we were younger, we did everything together. Shri, I don't know if you remember this, but I'm sure the second I say this, you're gonna remember. So on a my 21st birthday, obviously, well, I guess it's not obvious, but I'm a couple months older than Shri, so she wasn't able to come because we were all gonna go to the bars and like all this stuff. And uh we had a pregame and it was so fun. And the whole point was to wait until midnight, obviously, so that I could use my ID and get in, blah, blah, blah, whatever. Very ceremonious. Everything's fine, okay. We go inside the bar, I sit down, I start crying. The bartender looks at me and he's like, Wait, what? And then one of my friends come up comes over and the bartender looks at him and he's like, Is she okay? And he's like, Yeah, she's totally fine. And then he looks at me and he's like, Oh my god, are you okay? And I go, No, but yes, because like Cherie's not here. And that I was close with this guy, but like not that close. So he didn't know who you were. And he's like, Who is Cherie? I'm like, she's my cousin. We do everything together, and she's not here. I'm so upset. And he's like, uh, okay. And I'm like, yeah, I gotta call her, Toronto. I called Cherie in the dead of night. Yeah, and she picked up and she picked up and she's like, Hello, is everything okay? And I go back, still crying. I'm like, Yeah, but like you're not here, and it's so sad because we're supposed to do everything together. And I'm pretty sure Brandon was there too, and you were like, Yeah, no, she's good. He's like, Is everything okay? Having a moment, I do remember that. I was like, Where are you? You're like, I'm in a bar.

SPEAKER_04: 22:40

Like, are you alone?

SPEAKER_03: 22:41

They were literally all around. I was just like, Shuri isn't here. And then after I talked to you, I was fine. And I was like, All right, well, yeah, good night. And then went right back to it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04: 22:53

But I feel like the next birthday of yours, we had to get because it was the Halloween party for what's it called? Your frat.

SPEAKER_03: 23:00

Oh, I'm sorry, it was like when you were when what when we came to visit you? Sorry, yeah, it was when you came to visit. No, it was before it was before. I think I I was turning 20. So it was the first time me and Lily threw a birthday party because her birthday is also in October. And so we were like, okay, yes, and we were like, let's plan our birthday right in the middle of both of ours. We'll throw a party. We charged a cover, okay? We got all of this black light. We made it uh-huh, yeah, yes, and we made the jungle juice like glow in the dark. I don't even remember how we did that, but we were like, let's get ring pop so you can dip it in the jungle juice, and then like your mouth and your tongue will also glow in the black light. Oh my god, it was so crazy.

SPEAKER_01: 23:46

And you want to know what? No, go ahead.

SPEAKER_03: 23:50

No, because we might say the same thing. I just remember getting a text from my mother being like, So I heard you're throwing a party. I said, How do you know about that? She's like, Well, Aunt Daisy told me. I hope okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. That makes sense. They probably told her.

SPEAKER_01: 24:07

I love it.

SPEAKER_02: 24:12

And we we walked to the Halloween party you were having. I think I was like, so you were how old were you?

SPEAKER_03: 24:21

I think I was turning 20.

SPEAKER_02: 24:23

So I was like 27, and everybody there was like your age. They were like, oh my gosh, like you're so cool. Like, and I was like, what? Like, that's so weird. And then Shri and I were like having so much fun, then we're like, you know what? We want to go home because we're super tired.

SPEAKER_03: 24:41

So we home was your dorm.

SPEAKER_02: 24:44

So it was freezing because your birthday's the the end of October. We were freezing, we walked back. We walked probably like I don't even know how we got there, but I remember walking back. We walked like probably over a mile there.

SPEAKER_03: 24:55

Definitely it was far. It was your dorm room, yeah. Your dorm room, and we got in her bed, and like 2 a.m., Shri and I were just like looking at each other. We were like, We're hungry. Yeah, we ordered cheesecakes, and we were we were like, What are we gonna do? She was like, We can order food.

SPEAKER_02: 25:11

I was like, Finally, I think that's when Girl Pub is still kind of like nursery, kind of still like like on college campuses, yeah. And we were like, Okay, what do we do? So we ordered it, and then you weren't even back yet. So we ordered our food, we ate, and I think we saw you like the next morning, and we were just like, Yeah, you were like, Where'd you guys go?

SPEAKER_03: 25:29

We were like, we were tired and hungry, and we slept in your bed. And so funny, it's so funny because I remember the next day of like, okay, they're at my apartment, but I don't remember when you left. And I just knew that I wasn't able to leave because we were host, me and Lily were hosting it, but we were at we were at one of our friends' houses, and I felt so bad because she was really nervous because she was like, Listen, we've already gotten so many warnings, like it can't get loud, the cops can't come. All this stuff, we're like, please, please, please, like we promise it won't be bad, we'll be fine. We're like, we'll get like noise canceling stuff for the windows, like all of this stuff. And then at a certain point, I thought the cops did come up freaking out. Like for everybody, I might it was a little bit later, but like for anybody who doesn't know, like I very much still like to follow the rules. Like I didn't drink for a very long time. So, like, right around 20 is when I started, and I was just like, Oh my god, you guys, this is so scary. And everyone around was like, Blair, please chill out. Like, it's fine. And it was fine, it was fine, also to say, but I didn't remember when you guys had left. Um, and I knew that I needed to stay because she was so nice in letting us use her house that I wanted to clean up after. So I stayed till the end until everybody left. I was like, let me count how much money we made today. Because we wanted to make we wanted to make the money so that just in the event, well, one, we spent money, but two, just in case they got a fine, we wanted to be able to pay it for them, which is so wild. I'm like, not us running a business, low-key. Like, that's kind of crazy. I remember standing at the front being like, Do you have your five dollars?

SPEAKER_01: 27:12

Yeah, I remember being like, We want to go back, Sheree, but like, but I can't leave now.

SPEAKER_03: 27:17

Like, what do we do? Yeah, and I can't remember how we got there. Did you give us your key or maybe one of your key because either I gave you the key or honestly, Esha was probably home. I feel like he was there. And Shri and I was like, we have to walk back. So we literally it probably wasn't even that long, but it was crazy. It was long, it was long, and honestly, I'm proud that you guys found it.

SPEAKER_01: 27:42

Yeah, we were proud too, we were not fully there, yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 27:47

And we finally not fully there, but like even I didn't even know where this house was. Like, I'm glad that I was with Lily because this it was, I mean, she was friends with both of us, but she was closer with Lily. So Lily had been there before. I was like, I don't know how to get home. I'm just gonna follow her.

SPEAKER_02: 28:02

No, I love that, but that also segues into um my one of my coworkers was like, Oh, like your birthday's coming. I'm like, Oh, it's Twana's birthday side note, and I was like, Yeah, and they were like, Oh, what like what kind of food do you like? And I was like, Oh, I'll get back to you. They were just like, I was like, I don't want to make a big deal. They were like bunching, and I was like, my thing is like I don't like to be celebrated, but like I kind of low-key do. Um, so yeah, I was gonna I was happy that like my friends that showed up today showed up, and like the ones that couldn't, like, it wasn't like, oh, I don't like you, it was just because that they had legit like plans. Like some people have like failing number birthdays, like they were out of town, like stuff that had already planned. And I was just like thinking back to like Harrison's like um lunch that I had when I was pregnant with him, like so many people showed up for that. And I was just like, it's not because of me, I was like, it's because they have like it's life, like they have things to do.

SPEAKER_03: 29:02

And that's the thing too. I feel like it's not like yes, you know that, but even knowing that doesn't always make it easier to ask people to show up for you, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04: 29:13

Like dancing not feel sad if they're not able to, yeah. If they're not able to like, yeah, it's important to be able to do it.

SPEAKER_02: 29:18

Because part of me feels like I'm like, yeah, yeah, and I was like, Yeah, I'm excited, and I was like, I'm manifesting like good vibes, like it was so much fun, like we had so much fun. I love it. It was like an intimate gathering, and like I love the people that came and love the people that couldn't come also. But I'm just like, I know people a lot of people text me tomorrow my birthday, but I'm also just like low key love to be celebrated, but also low key don't like to admit that I don't like to be celebrated. My co worker was like, She likes to be celebrated, but she won't admit it, so yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 29:50

Oh, I it's the hardest part, at least for me. I'm like, why would I tell you I want you to celebrate me? It's like because you don't want to seem like need.

SPEAKER_02: 30:00

And like selfish, and I'm like, no, it's my birthday. Like, I deserve to be celebrated. Like, I'm amazing. I may come off as cocky, but it's just like I've been this way for 39 years.

SPEAKER_03: 30:14

Almost 39 years. Like, I deserve to be celebrated. And the people that know me celebrate me. And like, I literally love celebrating people's birthdays. Like, I love it. I told Sheree that. Like, she's told me that like in the years past. It's like, if you tell me your birthday one time, I'll remember forever. And it's just like, she's literally birthdays are your thing.

SPEAKER_02: 30:36

She's like, I hope you feel as celebrated as you celebrate other people on their birthday.

SPEAKER_03: 30:41

Because I'm just like, it's just like my thing.

SPEAKER_04: 30:44

Yeah, I just love celebrating people.

SPEAKER_03: 30:47

Me too, honestly.

SPEAKER_04: 30:48

I just love celebrating people. Wait, hold on. You're gonna be able to do that. Wait, wait, wait. Let me share a thought. Okay, please don't please. Um, okay, so if you could because this is from your list. Oh, yeah. If you had to give advice to the younger self at a milestone age, what would it be? And what age would you pick?

SPEAKER_03: 31:11

Oh, that's a good one. Um, okay, this is really random. And I don't remember the well, not okay, whatever it's a milestone in my head at this point now, it's every five intervals. So, like 30, 35, 40, 45, 50, 55. You know what I mean? So there's there's always more to come. But one thing that I did think about actually when you said that, I don't remember the age that I was, but it was back probably like beginning of college. Um, and it was back when Facebook was really popping off. And seeing how many people would um write on your wall for your birthday one year. One year I remember Neri, a Facebook post insight. Nobody wrote on my wall. I honestly, I think it was my freshman year, and I was I was in my head about it. I was like, wait a second, like I know I don't talk to that many people, but like I've got friends, like I've got people. What's going on? It was so crazy. And I was like, okay, I guess I'll just like leave it alone. Like it's totally fine, whatever. And I was getting really upset about it, but I didn't say anything to anybody. Then randomly, my mom texts me at the end of the day, and she goes, Hey, I was trying to write on your Facebook wall, but you turned off the option for people to write on it. Make sure you turn that on.

SPEAKER_01: 32:32

I go, Excuse me?

SPEAKER_03: 32:35

I missed, like, I essentially rejected everybody's wanting to wish me a happy birthday. Exactly. And no, and so if I could go back in time, I would literally tell freshman year me, hey, turn your wall on for Facebook so people can write on it. And you can, like, okay, life is not about external validation, but was I counting the number of people that wrote? Hell yeah, I was. I wanted to see how many people were gonna write to me, especially after high school. It was like, yeah, you see me popping off in college. Literally, I wasn't popping off. I was always in my room watching New Girl, but anyway, it's not the point. Um, I wanted to see how many people wanted to reach out to me, you know. So I literally, yeah. That's what I would tell myself.

SPEAKER_02: 33:17

I freaking agree. I know people that like turn off, like specifically around their birthdays, like um, like things to sign on their wall. But I think it's funny, like you didn't realize that you had done that.

SPEAKER_03: 33:30

No, and I was so upset. I was like, nobody likes me. I just we'll just I love it. Celebrate alone. The worst. I love it. Um I mean, I just love the birthdays. What advice would you give yourself? Oh for like one of the birthdays in the past. Oh, I feel like I would say that it's okay to if it's just you celebrating, it's okay to celebrate you. Yeah, maybe I should have listened to that too.

SPEAKER_02: 34:07

I mean, I'm still learning, only 39. But I literally just feel like like my friend, one of my friends there today asked me, she was like, Are you reflecting on anything like for like upcoming on like is your last year in this decade? And I was like, you know what? That's a good question. Because she's like, I reflect like coming into a decade and like leaving a decade because it's like things are coming and things we've learned. And my one thing is like trusting my gut more, and also only having people in my life like adults that know how to manage their own emotions. Okay, yes, here, here.

SPEAKER_03: 34:45

Yes, yes. So I feel like for me, my advice would just be like just celebrate you, like you are awesome as you.

SPEAKER_02: 34:55

Um I don't know, I just I was like learning to love myself more, like three, like I'm about to be well 40 next year, but still.

SPEAKER_03: 35:04

It's like yeah, it's like wild. I know it's so crazy because actually, let me tell you this. Maybe I already told you, but I was talking to Peyton, and it's so funny because I mean, I guess it's not funny, but like she was like, Well, yeah, like isn't Tawana 32? And I go, in the kindest way, like I'm about to be 32. She's like, I was and yeah, I'm like, and Tawana's seven years older than me, so no, yeah. Not anymore than that. But then she looks at me and she's like, You're gonna be 32. I was like, first of all, not too much on me, okay? But yes, I am.

SPEAKER_02: 35:43

I will say that I always look at you girls like Sheree and like Blair, and like your Blair or Blair, yes, Blair, and Taylor and Peyton is like always like my younger sister and cousins, and like always like the younger ages. So it makes sense to me that she thought I was like still 32 because for the longest time Taylor always thought I was 23.

SPEAKER_03: 36:06

That's so funny. Like, I don't even remember what 23 was like how old would I have been? 16, I guess. Yes, yeah, and I'm like, like, didn't register to me then that you were 23. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02: 36:18

Yeah, and like even today at the my birthday celebration, people are like, You're seven and a half years apart. I was like, Yeah, like we're closer now that we're older, but like thinking back, it's just like she like we're in the same decade now, like in the city.

SPEAKER_03: 36:32

There's such a big gap though.

SPEAKER_02: 36:34

But I'm just like, my cousins are like in their 20s and 30s. I'm like, I remember I was picking picking them up out of the crib.

SPEAKER_03: 36:42

Yeah, yeah. Wild when like you grow up. Wait, because what's the age gap between you and Peyton? Is it 15? Um because for me, me and Peyton, it's eight. So I'm 86, she's 2001, so it's what? Yeah, 15. That's wild. 15, yeah. That's crazy. That is so insane.

SPEAKER_02: 37:03

But it's just like even at like Siri's wedding, I was like, I have a picture at work of like the five of us, the like some of the picture of the five of us, and I'm just like, oh my gosh, like we were like full-grown women. This was just last year, and they're still my younger cousins.

SPEAKER_03: 37:20

I know. Wait, actually, I was thinking about like random memories when you were just got not like this like elusive abstract figure, but kind of because you're just like the older cousin who wasn't always around, but like you were, but you're so cool, and like we weren't really talking to you. Um, and two memories came to mind, okay? Maybe three, but the first one was when you helped us when I thought we were gonna get in so much trouble with your mom. Me and she spilled it. Yep, we spilled like, oh my god, it was just water. Like we could have just thought for a second. We spilled water in the family room, yes, and we were freaking out, and you're like, just put a pillow over it. And I was like, Oh my god, she's so smart. And then she did, and then we did, and then a couple minutes went by. Obviously, because of how things work, the water dried up, so it was gone. But then your mom came home, or she just came into the room, she's like, Why is this pillow on the ground? I it was like one of those episodes of a TV show where you have like the dramatic music of like, Oh my god, they're gonna find us out. And I just saw her going down to pick up the pillow, and I was like, This is it, this is it. She picks it up, there's no stain. It's a wrap of it, it's water, yeah. Literally, that's what I thought. And then she was like, Girls, why are you leaving the pillows around? We're like, I don't know, just like moved on. And then the other thing was I was like, Okay, our cool older cousin. The fact that you were able to skip school and go to New York, go to Times Square, and be on TRL. Yeah. I just remember we were all at Nanny and Popup's house sitting. We were like, let's turn on MTV to watch Tawana, Matthew, and Kim on TRL. Excuse me, no, no, no. It was Tawana, it was Nadeira and Kim. Oh, I thought Matthew was there. Sorry, sorry to Nadeira, not trying to no Nadeira erasure, my bad. Yeah, it was crazy to me. I was like, how is my cousin on TV, on TRL of all things? But anyway, I digress. I don't even know how we got here. I forget what the question was. I feel like we didn't Shri didn't even get a chance to answer yet.

SPEAKER_04: 39:44

I feel like the age that comes to mind is 25 because I remember being most excited for like, okay, everything's gonna click, my brain's gonna flip. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 39:53

You were all about like the brain helping in 25, the prefrontal cortex.

SPEAKER_03: 39:57

Yeah, she was all about that.

SPEAKER_04: 39:59

I think it was like just leading up to that a very tough time. So I would tell myself that it gets better, and since then it hasn't better.

SPEAKER_03: 40:10

Yeah, it just literally, if I could have even given you, like at 25, a montage of how life gets better, all I would have done was just played a camera role of your wedding, like it was so fun. Like, that's so true.

SPEAKER_02: 40:31

The wedding was and I literally have wedding pictures at work, like if the five months with me and her, and I'm just like, and Shrey was like, I watched the videos like randomly sometimes. I'm like, that was like so fun, yeah, so much fun. Oh my god, we were all together, we took pictures, and I was just like, it was it was the best.

SPEAKER_04: 40:53

That is very that's very insightful. I appreciate that perspective. I'm gonna hang on to that because yeah, yeah, I mean, like other good things have happened, but I feel like that felt like everything kind of at once, and like everyone being together, and yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 41:08

Like all of all of those like good moments built up to that, you know what I mean? And then everybody got to be together and like like sage's flower rolls, so cute. Oh my god. I loved it, and I also like I remember one point, um, you were just like you were thinking with your sisters, you were like, Oh, where's Nanny and Papa?

SPEAKER_02: 41:30

And we're like, oh, like they're obviously not here, like not to get emotional, but it's just like they would have literally eaten that up. They would have loved that so much. For sure. Um and I think about that often, like they would have loved the kids, like Sage and RJ and Harry, and like they would have loved all that we're doing, and like it was just it was still a good time, obviously, but I feel like they would have Papa would have given like the he would have knocked the speed chat out of the ballpark.

SPEAKER_04: 41:57

Oh for sure, for sure.

SPEAKER_02: 42:02

Well that was a good time.

SPEAKER_03: 42:04

Um but our your caretaker is calling.

SPEAKER_04: 42:09

Yeah, I have to go retrieve my child.

SPEAKER_03: 42:14

Hi oh my gosh, Sagey Sage.

SPEAKER_04: 42:18

Yes, um, this was so fun.

SPEAKER_02: 42:20

We loved this episode, obviously. We're sad that you're uh three hours away, time zone wise, but like five hours.

SPEAKER_03: 42:26

I know, yeah, it's a long ride, it runs. We know we've done it twice. I was gonna say, I'll be home for Christmas. I have not gotten my flight yet. Okay, but I will be home. Um, so let's chat. Let's chat about me coming down. I feel like all of us want to come down to see you guys because last year we just didn't because we saw you at the wedding.

SPEAKER_02: 42:50

No, I feel like oh that's true. It was like the year before that. I feel like it's been like two-ish, like you guys usually, it's usually like an annual thing, but last year we saw each other at the wedding, so it wasn't doable for Christmas, but yeah.

SPEAKER_04: 43:02

Yeah, but we we love you, we miss you. That's not my bad.

SPEAKER_03: 43:08

Love you, miss you guys too.

SPEAKER_02: 43:11

Yes, and then we'll have we will do an episode with you and your sisters to do like a cousin themed thing. Yes, yes, we'll do like family stuff. We'll talk, we have we'll have so many stories about nanny and pop up and just like growing up and like only stuff like we yeah, of course, with the thunderstorms, we've got a lot.

SPEAKER_03: 43:28

Stay tuned, we have a lot for you guys, a lot to unpack.

SPEAKER_02: 43:32

Yeah, things will be really things will only be like really special to us, but like Yeah, pop-up Spanish rice.

SPEAKER_03: 43:37

I've never had another like it.

SPEAKER_01: 43:38

Like actually, the next time I had some chicken, his chicken.

SPEAKER_03: 43:44

I actually think that I've gotten it down to taste like his. I'm not kidding. Next time I see you guys, or you're here, like I'll make it for you because I broil it and I've got this specific seasoning. I'm like, this is what pop up used. Told me about that.

SPEAKER_04: 43:55

It was Uncle Tony's or something.

SPEAKER_03: 43:57

Yeah, Creole seasoning, it's like something, something. Yeah, I have I'll just take a picture and send it to you guys. But oh so good. Oh my gosh, so good. And of course, the spaghetti, of course, spaghetti night. And then spaghetti spaghetti in a bag, spaghetti in a bag. Anybody? She said, love you, love you.

SPEAKER_02: 44:18

Oh my god, the sausage, and whenever I used to slip over, they used to make the biscuit biscuits. Like, I know it's just bisquick, but it was just like still, I never had that it takes eggs and the bisquick, and just like oh my gosh, like the leftover sausage, like literally. I think about them so much, like often. I'm just like, they would literally eat the children up.

SPEAKER_03: 44:43

Oh, for sure, for sure. They would have loved it just to like be able to have them over, you know.

SPEAKER_02: 44:51

Not just that, but like I feel like nanny and both of them, Papa would like make a way to like come down here to like, yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_03: 45:00

Like honestly, Pop up would have figured it out, and Nanny would have been like, All right, let's go. Like he figured everything out. And also, of course, Christmas, when he would come to the house with like a bag full of presents, I was like, Pop up, how did these presents like why are you bringing them? He goes, Santa brought them. I was like, to your house? He goes, Yeah, and now I'm bringing them here. I go, Oh my gosh, there's so it was so many toys. Like, and then he went to your guys' house and brought them for Sherry too. I don't know if I imagine he did it for you too. Yeah, he would always make sure he did it in the morning. Yeah. Oh my gosh, so fun. And I loved also, I mean, obviously, we're gonna end the podcast soon, but I loved that we lived five minutes away from each other. You know what I mean? Like just wasn't it seven minutes? Sure. I mean, no, I think what I will say, what I will say though, is that it was one hour walking, and I'll say that story for a different time. Me and Shri literally walked it because okay, I guess I'll tell it now. Because did you go? Did you go through Willomere? No, we didn't. We went on like the main road and we walked the whole way past shop, right? Super G, stop and shop, all the variations. Um, because your mom made meatballs the night before, and we were so hungry at my house. And Shree looked at me, she goes, Well, I have meatballs in my house. I go, Well, how are we gonna get there? We were too young to drive. My dad was home. I go, Hey, can me and Shri walk there? And he goes, Sure. We were like, Oh my god, that's so cool. We walked for an hour just to get meatballs at your house. Honestly, we were living, it was great.

SPEAKER_02: 46:37

It was so meatballs that you loved, her pasta salad, her tuna fish.

SPEAKER_03: 46:43

Let me let me tell you, let me tell you something about Daisy's pasta salad. Like, there is nothing else that tops that like no, and the I still make it to this day. Tawana, everyone gives me so much credit. They're like, Blair, your pasta salad's amazing. I go, you don't even know the half of it. This isn't my recipe. This is my Aunt Daisy's recipe. And they were like, Okay, well, shout out to your Aunt Daisy. Every time we do anything in the summer, we go to someone's house, we're having a barbecue. They're like, Hey Blair, can you make your pasta salad? I'm like, of course. It takes like two seconds.

SPEAKER_01: 47:14

Like, it's not mine, but sure.

SPEAKER_03: 47:16

And I'm like, and I can show you how to make it. They're like, No, no, no, no, I just want you to make it. I'm like, okay, I'm like, it's so simple. You could be having this every weekend. Yeah. Oh my god, it was great. It was so simple.

SPEAKER_02: 47:26

I love it. I miss literally Nellie said, I miss Papa's sausage on spaghetti. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It was, I used to love to have it. Like, obviously, there'd be enough for leftovers, obviously, all the time.

unknown: 47:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 47:40

So it's like leftovers on like Saturday, and I'm just like, oh my gosh, the best.

SPEAKER_03: 47:47

It was so good. It was so, so good. And he used to make the sauce. Like he used to make like it was like jar sauce, but like he would add like green pepper. Yes, so much to it. Like, I never honestly, not to be like, I mean, I don't know how this will come across, but like I have not had a pasta sauce like it since, but I will know when I do because it just stands out in my mind every Friday, which I know, and we can get into the politics on that of which day was for which meal. But for me, every Monday was chicken. Tuesday, it toss up, Wednesday, Chinese food. Shout out, Shanghai Express. Ted, love y'all down. Yeah. Shanghai Express is so good. And then on Thursday was pizza. Love y'all big. And then on Friday it was spaghetti night. And pizza was a little controversial because we would always be changing like brands, kind of. So for a while we had Papa John's Hut or Papa John's. Yeah, until we started complaining. Well, not complaining, advocating. Let me positively reframe. I love dominoes. Okay. Oh my gosh, hi. I love dominoes, you know. So we had that, and then we had Pizza Hut, yes, and Papa John's. So yes. Anyway, is this where I leave you? Is this where we're gonna sign off? I think so. I miss you so much. We both miss you so much. I miss you guys too. I was just actually okay. I know I said we were gonna end, but hold on. I was just talking to my parents, and I was like, you guys, listen, seasons are changing, and obviously, like people like we're going into different seasons of life. So if ever, do not hesitate. If you need me to move home, you let me know. So I don't know. I feel like I more than before, I feel like I'm more open to like moving back to the east coast if I need andor want to. So yeah, stay tuned for any changes like that. But right now, what I will say is that I really do like living on the west coast. So we'll see. Who knows? Who knows?

SPEAKER_02: 49:55

Yeah, I get that, and we love you and we miss you.

SPEAKER_03: 50:00

I love you guys, and I'll talk to you later.

unknown: 50:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04: 50:06

Love you guys.

SPEAKER_03: 50:07

Bye. Bye, my October birthday, cousin.

SPEAKER_02: 50:12

Birthday twin-ish month twin.

SPEAKER_03: 50:17

Yeah, signing off.

unknown: 50:19

All right, guys.

SPEAKER_04: 50:22

We'll talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.

SPEAKER_02: 50:28

All right, everyone. This was another episode of Turn the Page Podcast. Thanks for hanging out. Don't forget to like, listen, and subscribe. And also don't forget to leave a review, please, and let us know what you thought about today's episode and all the other episodes. Thanks, guys. Talk to you soon.