75: The 3 A.M. Survival Guide

3 A.M., can make you feel like you’re the only person awake on the planet, holding a baby in the dark and wondering how you’ll do tomorrow on this little sleep. Sheree jumps on for a solo, real-life check-in from the postpartum newborn trenches and shares what’s genuinely helping her navigate sleepless nights with a newborn plus an older kid in the mix.

We talk about the mindset shifts that change everything when you’re spiralling at night: remembering that this season will pass, reframing wakeups as normal newborn biology, and giving yourself permission to admit when you can’t access the “positive” perspective. From there, we get practical. Sheree breaks down the small tools that keep her regulated and sane, like building a grab-and-go nightstand survival station with earbuds for podcasts and audiobooks, water and snacks, white noise, comfort items, and quick mantras that bring you back to centre. She also shares why scrolling can blow up your sleep and what to reach for instead when you need distraction without the dopamine hit.

You’ll also hear a simple checklist for those frantic moments when baby won’t settle, plus soothing resets that help both parent and baby, like fresh air, water, rocking, walking, and humming. 

Sheree explains the heart behind her digital 3 A.M. Survival Guide in our Etsy shop, designed to feel like a supportive sister or best friend on the nights your village is asleep.

If you know a new mom, a “new again” mom, or any sleep-deprived parent, share this with them. 

Subscribe, leave a review, and tell us what gets you through the hardest hour.

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Transcript

Welcome To Turn The Page

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Welcome to Turn the Page Podcast.

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Sisters, best friends, and brunch enthusiasts.

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With relatable episodes that feel like you're chatting with two of your closest friends or sisters. Join us as we turn the page to different topics about losing yourself in motherhood, adulthood, anyhood.

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And finding yourself again through meaningful friendships, shameless piles of unread library books, and endless Amazon package deliveries. Real, honest, and a little bit chaotic.

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We talk about it all. So grab your favorite drink, put the kids to bed, lace up your sneaks or whatever you need to do and join us. We can't wait to connect with you.

A Solo Moment Of Quiet

SPEAKER_01 0:44

Hi everyone. This is Sheree. I am one of the co-hosts of Turn the Page Podcast. And I've got a solo episode for you guys today. I had the kids taken off my hands by my lovely mother-in-law just on a whim, which felt really nice. So I just met with my nutritionist in peace and I was actually able to focus on our appointment. Bless her, she's always so patient and understanding. I found her through the nourish. But you should check it out if you're interested. I think it's free through a lot of insurance or like zero dollar copay. So yeah, I was able to do that. And then I figured I would hop on here and knock out what I can while I can. So hi. The

Postpartum Trenches And 3 A.M.

SPEAKER_01 1:35

topic I wanted to talk about for this solo episode is something that is very near and dear to me in my current season of life. It is another it's a season of life I've been in previously, and I'm hoping that it reaches people that are in a similar spot or soon to be in a similar spot. Postpartum and the newborn trenches. I have been trying to navigate it differently this time around. And something that came to me while I was up feeding my baby was I know what to do this time, and I wish that I knew last time because it could have really just been a game changer for me the way that it has been this time. And I just went into my phone and made a list of all of these things that have been helpful, and I realized like there is no resource for this. So I made a resource for this. It is live in our Etsy shop, and I'm not really big on like advertising and shameless, aka shameful plugs. I'm just weird about stuff like that, but I uploaded it and gave zero context. So this is kind of my chance to just explain where I was coming from, what my hope is for the product, my goal for people who might use it and might find it helpful. So if you are privy to our Etsy shop, our turn-the-page journals Etsy shop, I just recently uploaded 3 a.m. survival guide because y'all, 3 a.m. is the trenches of the trenches of the new, like it truly is. It's that like in between time where it's late enough that you could get some more sleep if you're able to go back to sleep, or you could just stay up and thug it out for the morning. It is like a really tough limbo in between time. And unfortunately, this time around, a lot of it it's not just dependent on my baby, it's also dependent on my toddler. Preschooler? Honestly, when does toddler age end? Maybe she's a preschooler. She's three and a half, but yeah, like I could be up with him at three, get him down by four, four thirty, and go back to sleep. Or there could be a morning like today where I'm thinking, like, great, he's down at 4:30. I can get like two or three more hours of sleep, and all actuality, probably like maximum two before she wakes up. And she woke up within 45 minutes of that. So we've all been up since 515. Baby's had his naps, but yeah, so so much of it is dependent on like external factors and me being the anxious girly that I am, the type A personality that I am, it's important to me to feel like there are things that I have some control over. So I've just accumulated a list of things that I need to do, need to kind of keep up with, stay on track to stay sane. So I'm gonna share some of those resources and how I've can how and why I've compiled them in my 3 a.m. survival guide. So again, this is for new moms, new again moms, for sleepless nights, sleep regressions, teething, sick babies, whenever it makes sense for you. If it makes sense, I hope it's helpful. Overall, though, I wanted this to really just speak to being a support person in the middle of the night because I know how it feels when it seems like you and your baby are the only two up in the world. It's really isolating. It can be really dark, it can be really depressing and lonely. And there have been times where I would like text my sister and she answers because she's up with her kids, you know, but that's not always the case. People aren't always awake. People don't want to be on their phone when they're awake, they just want to get the kid back to sleep and then go back to sleep themselves. So, my goal for this resource was to feel like being able to text your big sister or your little sister if they had a baby first. Being able to text your sister or your best friend, your mom friend in the middle of the night and feel supported if that's not actually available for you. It's a way to feel like your village is there, your support is there to wrap their arms around you, to hold you as you're holding your baby, and just let you know that you will get through it because you have gotten through it. I'm sure you got through it the night before, you know. Babies wake up, and it is maddening sometimes. But yeah, I mean, we somehow figure out a way to get through it, and this is how I've been getting through it.

Reframing The Middle Of The Night

SPEAKER_01 6:56

It helps me to keep that in perspective, like to just remind myself, it's so cheesy, but this too shall pass. This will pass. This is a blink in time, and I'm able to have that perspective as a second-time mom. I did not have that perspective as a first-time mom. It felt like the season that I was in was the rest of my life, and that was really intimidating and scary and exhausting, and I'm sure contributed to my postpartum depression and anxiety. But knowing that this will pass, your baby will eventually sleep through the night. And being able to reframe it as like they still they're still really, really, really dependent at this age. Obviously, they can't even hold their damn necks up. They need us. And if we can just like tend to and respond to the need and get that addressed, and then we can take care of ourselves, it's a lot easier than just feeling surprised by it every time. The other reframe that's been helping me too is like, thank God, you know, thank God. I'm hearing him cry, I'm hearing him wake up. I have been reading that like it's like biologically sound babies are supposed to wake up because they need to eat, and yeah, it just keeps things flowing the way that they need to. So if you can find a reframe, finding a moment to just like pause and look at it from a different perspective has been helpful for me. The other thing though that I included in this guide is like sometimes you can't keep that perspective. So, like, what do you need if you're feeling overwhelmed, lonely, frustrated, if you can't fall back asleep, if your baby is inconsolable. Yeah, because you're not always able to have that light, fresh, it'll be fine perspective. Sometimes you are like pulling out your hair. So yeah, that just became kind of a directory for where to go, what to pull from. I threw out some things that have been helpful for me and what I knew was helpful for my sister. Because sometimes I think when you're in the thick of it, you don't think about what's helpful for you. You might already have those things at home, but you're not thinking to pull from them. Or maybe you need to hop on a quick online store and order some to be delivered.

Your Nightstand Survival Station

SPEAKER_01 9:25

But have some earbuds, y'all. Whether you're listening to a podcast, an audiobook, music, sleep sounds, a show, like sitting in the dark room in silence was absolutely a trigger for depression for me. And I did it every night during maternity leave. At that point, I don't know why, but I was still using like the headphones that plug in. So I didn't want the cord and the baby and blah blah blah. I think at some point my husband did get me earbuds, but I just like would always forget to charge them. So I would literally sit and rock her for hours on end because that baby did not like to sleep in the dark, in the silence, and just feel like so alone. Like it's just me and this baby, and no one knows. I would feel like no one knows how this feels, no one knows what's going on, no one knows how isolating this is. Like just being in these four walls with like you can't see, you just hear silence. It's it's really hard. So, yeah, earbuds have been a game changer for me this time around, and just having endless audiobooks on deck. That's usually what I'm doing in the middle of the night, or like reading my Kindle app on my phone to read an ebook. I try to avoid social media because that is what like fully breaks wakes my brain up. And then once baby's down, I'm like, damn, I can't fall back asleep. So yeah, and then I try to have like nourishment nearby. If it's a snack, maybe I didn't finish or never got to, some water. I have like my teddy that I've had since I was a baby, or just like a comfort blanket or something. I've actually been keeping some Nido close by too. I don't know if anybody's familiar with actually my cousin, our cousin Blair introduced me to it. It's like a stress ball, but it's in a cube and there's gel or silicone, I don't know, on the inside. So it always just kind of goes back to its original shape. That's been great to have on hand. Obviously, you need some white noise, whether it's through an app or a white noise machine. And lavender, lavender essential oil. I use it for baby massage, I use it for myself in the middle of the night, or you can get like the spray for your pillow, but just make sure you are good because if mom's not good, baby's not good. I have like a station that I have all this stuff set up at. Easy to grab. I don't have to get up from my bed or where I'm sitting. But yeah, like it's okay to make sure you're set and you have everything that you need. And then I just threw in some, of course, some mindfulness exercises, some affirmations almost just the mantras, things you can repeat to yourself, things to remember, like a checklist to go through. Because again, when you're in the thick of it and your baby is screaming at you, and in this case, when my baby's screaming, my immediate thought is like, don't wake your sister up. Dear God, do not wake that girl up. Not only does she need her sleep because she does not nap anymore, but once she's up, she's up. And like we suffered severely with her in sleep, it just started getting like a little bit more stable, I would say, in the past year or so, but yeah, so we'd have like split nights where she'd be up from one to four or just something stupid like that. Or if she took a nap, she wouldn't go to sleep until 11. So for the love of God, everybody is on the same page. Do not wake up the preschooler. Um, so that's usually my first goal. I'm just trying to get him calm so that he doesn't wake anybody up. And now my husband's back to work. Don't wake up your dad. You know, let's figure it out between us. No one else needs to know what's going on. So sometimes I do need to be reminded, like, run through the basics.

Settle Baby Without Losing Yourself

SPEAKER_01 13:29

What could it be? Diaper, hungry, gas, uh, you know, are you cold? Are you hot? Just kind of basic things, but then, oh, my cat's here. If you heard the jingle jangle, soothing things that are actually pretty soothing for us too. Like rocking your baby can be really soothing. Walking around humming to your baby can be soothing. I remember too, with my oldest, my mother-in-law told us water or fresh air for you and the baby. Like worse comes to worse, if nothing else is working, get that baby outside, you open a window, stand outside, take some deep breaths of fresh air, or put the baby in the bath, splash some water on your face, you take a shower if baby can sit quietly and safely, you know. You don't have to suffer or struggle. Like, there are ways that you can help yourself while you're also helping your baby settle and get back to sleep so that you can get some sleep. Which I also included in there. Like, what are we doing after baby's asleep? How are we getting you back to sleep? Because again, if mom's not good, nobody's good. And this isn't just for moms. The guide is I did it for moms because so much of postpartum is not just sleepless nights, it's also the hormones, it's adjusting to just having a baby, it's the mental shift that happens that doesn't always happen, it doesn't happen for dads because it they don't have the same hormone crash and they don't go through the same physical process that we do. But overall, this is for like anybody that's up with babies, even support people, you know. I wanted to try to reach people who maybe don't feel like they know what they're doing because I've been there and I still don't know what I'm doing, but this is one thing that has been working for me, and I feel confident because I'm nine weeks in, and some nights I don't get sleep, but some nights I do. And the nights that I'm up because baby's struggling, or I just stay up because I know my toddler's preschooler is about to wake up. Just things that have been able to keep me sane, things that have allowed me to take care of myself while I'm taking care of my baby, and then eventually my family for the day. A lot of times, too. My sister and I have talked about like screens are disruptive to sleep, even though it's easy, it's right there, it's a good distraction, it's in your hand, it's quiet, you know. So I did also some like screen-free activities that you can do if you're sensitive to the phone. There's a partner cheat sheet. How are we supporting our partners through this? And just like a mini version, a printable, something easy if you don't feel like you can go through the whole guide. Or to have like on your nightstand or your fridge, something that's more easily accessible. Something that is near and dear to my heart, too, is I included books that got myself but and my sister through postpartum. Because that has, again, really been a game changer. Those audiobooks are my besties. Do you hear me? There is a wallpaper that you can download that's similar to the printable, but it's just like a quick rundown of like, here are the steps, here's what you need to do in this moment to like regulate. Nothing else matters. And it's just a quick thing, like tap your phone and it's there. We got some resources for mental health support, apps that we like and that have been helpful, access to all of our turn-the-page information. Yeah, I this feels like a big deal to me because not only did I work on this in my middle of the night wakeups with my baby, but this is something that I genuinely would have used if it was available my first time around. Yeah, so hopefully this helps a new or a new again mom. I'm not an expert by any means. I absolutely struggle and don't know what I'm doing and have a hard time. And it's also dependent on your situation, your support, your baby, you, your postpartum recovery. But these are the things that have been helpful for me, and I just wanted to share them. I'm not anybody's big sister, so this is my chance to kind of just like I don't know, maybe step into that role and share the wealth a little bit. So

Download Details And How To Share

SPEAKER_01 18:16

this is my shameless slash shameful plug for my 3 a.m. survival guide because I'm really hoping that it's helpful. I'm really hoping to just kind of get the word out and reach people. It's a digital download. You can get it on your phone, your iPad, your computer, wherever it's easier for you. And yeah, if you are new, a new again mom yourself, or you know somebody that is or will be soon, please feel free to share. Please feel free to let me know your thoughts. Feedback is always welcome. And yeah, just hoping that this is a resource that is beneficial for other people as well. Thank you for listening to me ramble and shamefully plug my 3 a.m. survival guide. It's in our Etsy shop or at Turn the Page Journals. And even if you don't get the digital download, hopefully this episode was helpful. Again, let me know. Find us on Instagram, reply to our email newsletters if you get them. If you don't, what are you doing? You're missing a lot. And yeah, more to come. Thank you for listening. Like, listen, subscribe, and review, and talk to you soon. Bye. All right, everyone. This was another episode of Turn the Page Podcast.

SPEAKER_00 19:43

Thanks for hanging out. Don't forget to like, listen, and subscribe. And also don't forget to leave a review, please, and let us know what you thought about today's episode and all the other episodes. Thanks, guys. Talk to you soon. Bye.